Bronze Screen

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Bronze Screen was a Flarlandian sketch/archive television series that ran on Channel 14 over the course of three seasons between October 1998 and April 2001. The series was narrated by comedian Parker Wales and was produced on a relatively small budget.

The series covered generally obscure, rare or offensive excerpts of television footage from numerous media archives, usually accompanied by Wales' biting commentary and cynical approach to what was being shown. Wales used a variety of categories on the show to accompany a particular selection of programme footage. The show was also characterized by its musical score of campy jingles introducing the regular segments.

Background[edit | edit source]

Wales had worked before for Club X (back then on Channel Ten) with his segment, Buygones. Khyber Waterman secretly worked for the segment, as one of its two editors (the other being Wales himself). In 1992, after Club X changed to FBC 3, he was invited to produce and narrate three segments made for the occasion, while also creating a series of one-off independent productions mainly concerning television and the arts.

Bronze Screen was intended to be picked up by Channel 14's TV Academy, but his production company failed initial rounds in 1995. In March 1998, UWB unilaterally agreed upon the greenlighting of the series, with a season of eight episodes.

Regular segments[edit | edit source]

Honest Obituary[edit | edit source]

Karaoke Vomit[edit | edit source]

Assassination of the Week[edit | edit source]

Appears in season 1.

Crappy Channel of the Week[edit | edit source]

A piece mocking the most under budget and mismanaged of obscure television studios: college, hospital and local television.

Tantrums of the Week[edit | edit source]

Appeared once a season.

Fantasy Program of the Week[edit | edit source]

A segment pondering aloud what certain celebrities would be doing if they chose a different action to affect the outcome of their productions. One notable segment depicted a prediction of what FBC 1's Probe would look like in 2000.

Exotic TV[edit | edit source]

The segment looks at television programs made in far-off countries of the world. One such segment depicted a courtroom series called Icheoku, considered to be the NTA's answer to Wembley Court. Occasionally the segment visited Flarland's overseas territories.

Failure[edit | edit source]

Homos of the Valley[edit | edit source]

On-location spoof of The People of the Valley, whose main characters are a couple of gay men. They are constantly being neglected by the local commissioner, Gordon Alistair, who threatens to take them away.

It's Nice[edit | edit source]

Appears in season 1.

Prank calls[edit | edit source]

Production and reruns[edit | edit source]